Honesty.

I haven’t written in ages and I haven’t felt like writing in ages. I read two verses tonight. Just two. And that was for the first time in about two weeks or so. The thing is, I don’t really feel bad about it. Usually I’m craving it. Even if I purposely avoid reading or push it off for another time, I miss it. But I haven’t. And that scares me. I’m also feeling very emotional tonight and it’s not helping. I keep having to remind myself that being a Christian isn’t a convenience role. It’s like…I think it’s like being a parent. You’re just stuck with it, even when it’s hard. But you never truly regret it. You know it’s life-changing in a positive way even when you think you can’t handle it. But tonight, if I’m being honest, I just want to scream and cry and quit everything.  

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